Thursday, April 30, 2009


We took our dirtball children to the carnival tonight. Many lessons were learned.

1. I no longer have an affinity for carnival rides. Like - ZERO. We went on the ferris wheel and I just about puked... BTW - the kids thought this was a riot. Then we cruised over to the bears. (A ride where you sit inside a large metal bear and spin around until you either a) die or b) kill your kid.) I wasn't planning on engaging in this joyous ride but the worker looks up from his phone and says to me, "Dude - which one of you is going to go on with them?" Geana doesn't even ride shotgun in the car without vomiting, thus I was volunteered. This ride sucked more than the ferris wheel.

2. All workers at carnivals are now required to be texting someone from their phone while operating the rides. Literally - every single ride we went on, the operator was texting. We discovered that the optimal time for texting is while the current riders are exiting the ride and before the next wave takes their spots on the ride. This gives the carny ample time to type 50 to 100 characters. One clever operator actually said, "Okay parents - feel free to come in and help get your kids." While we handled the kids, the woman proceeded to sit down, whip out her phone, and text her toothless brother to tell him about the "Quintruplets" that were on her ride, I'm sure.

3. Anna likes funnel cake.